The Hip Replacement Podcast – Episode 3 Transcript
Welcome to The Hip Replacement Podcast, where recovery meets motivation and healing leads to a whole new lifestyle. I’m Chris Bystriansky, your host. I’m an author, athlete, and double hip replacement patient.
I’ve been through the surgeries, the setbacks, and the comebacks, and I’m here to help you do the same. Each week, I’ll bring you tips, tools, expert advice, and inspiring stories to help you take back your life one step at a time.
Thanks for joining The Hip Replacement Podcast. New hips, new you. Let’s go.
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Welcome to The Hip Replacement Podcast. I’m Chris Bystriansky, your host. I’ve had both of my hips replaced — I’m about 10 years past one surgery and 12 years past the other.
In that time, I’ve done some great things. I’ve completed IRONMAN triathlons, other endurance events, and I’ve lived a pretty active, healthy lifestyle.
Today we’re talking about something that’s really important in the recovery process. A lot of us stay focused on what we are going through, but many of us also have support from a spouse, a family member, or a friend — people who go through this process with us.
If you’re watching on video, you can see someone sitting next to me. I want to introduce you to my wife, Allison.
Allison was with me through the entire process — from the years when I was very active, to watching my activity level reduce and reduce, to finding out I needed hip replacement surgery, and then going through surgery and recovery.
Honestly, I would not be sitting here today — and I would not have had the results I’ve had after either surgery — if it weren’t for Allison. She’s been a great wife by my side for a long time, and she was also a great nurse for several months after surgery.
And maybe even a little bit of a psychiatrist or mental coach when I thought things weren’t moving fast enough or going the way I wanted.
So thank you, Allison, for being here and for all the help you’ve given me over the years.
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This is actually something a little strange.
I’ve asked Allison before what she did while I was in surgery — how long I was out, what she did while she waited, things like that. She gave me answers, but that’s honestly all we’ve ever talked about when it comes to her experience.
I’ve never really asked her: What were you going through? How did this affect you? What were your concerns?
So today, for the first time, we’re going to talk about what it was like for Allison — my spouse — going through my hip replacement surgeries.
And I’m doing this because it matters. She was an integral part of my recovery, and if you’re listening, chances are you have someone important to your recovery too.
So let’s get her perspective.
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Allison, I’m going to ask you the same question I asked you twice — once about 12 years ago and once about 10 years ago.
What did you do while I was in surgery?
Allison: First, thank you for having me on the podcast. I appreciate it, and I hope the answers I give will be helpful to those listening.
Great question. I sat in the waiting room and waited for the surgeon or the surgeon’s representative to come out and give updates.
I think I may have been a little more laid back than the average person because I work in the healthcare industry and had exposure to hospitals, surgeries, and health systems in my prior experience. I had also observed surgeries in an operating room and had been through some orthopedic surgeries myself.
So I knew a little bit of what to expect.
However, when it’s someone you love going through surgery, there’s always an element of uncertainty. Something can always go wrong. Of course, I was worried and apprehensive, and I prayed and hoped everything would go well.
I hoped Chris would come out on the other side of surgery with a hip that was better than what he had before he began experiencing pain.
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Chris: I’m glad you weren’t too concerned — because I was scared. I was a wreck for a while.
That’s what I meant when I said she was part psychiatrist or mental health coach. She never said “stop being a baby,” but she was a rock for me when I really needed support. I wasn’t happy about having surgery at all.
So, what were some of your concerns? You saw me being very active 5, 10, 15 years before the surgeries. What were your concerns about the results — and were you going through anything else around the time of the first surgery?
Allison: Yes. I was about seven months pregnant — maybe even eight months pregnant — when you had your first hip surgery.
So here I am with this big belly, my first child, sleeping overnight in your hospital room on an adjustable cot. Not the most comfortable thing, but doable.
While you were in surgery, my concerns were: Is everything going to go well? Are you going to get the specific hip we were hoping you’d get?
Chris was part of a clinical trial where the physician was using different hip options, and one seemed better suited to an active lifestyle than the other.
And of course, the other concern is: could anything go wrong? Even things that are unlikely — you still think about them.
I also wondered what your recovery would be like. Would you be able to get back to the activity you had before? How soon would you be able to get down on the floor and play with our baby? Would you be able to run around with our child, and future children?
Would the hip replacement allow that? Would you need another surgery 20 or 30 years down the road?
Those were some of my concerns.
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Chris: Wow. That was a lot. I was mostly worried about waking up.
You mentioned the different kind of hip — and that’s going to be the subject of another episode. I was part of a study where I didn’t know which one I’d get: a standard polyethylene liner or a ceramic liner, which was newer in the U.S. at the time and was supposed to last longer.
Quick ending: I did get the ceramic one. But we’ll talk about that in another episode.
My primary fear going into surgery was waking up — being there for my wife and our child coming soon.
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I went through this twice, about 18 months apart. Were your concerns different the second time?
Allison: Yes, absolutely. I wasn’t as concerned the second time around. I knew what to expect. Same surgeon, same hospital system, same team — so that helped.
A different concern was that now we had a young child, so it was about making sure she was taken care of while you were in surgery, and making sure I could be there for you when you needed me and also be there for her.
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Chris: It was easier for me too the second time around because I knew what to expect and I was getting great results from the first surgery.
The first time I was terrified. The second time my mindset was more like, “Let’s get this over with.”
And I do want to say: having someone support me during recovery was huge.
Let me give a few examples.
The first night I came home, my pain meds weren’t working like they should have. Around midnight, I was in excruciating pain. We called the number we had, and a doctor was able to prescribe a stronger or different medication.
At 1:00 a.m., my pregnant wife went to a pharmacy that was open all night and got the prescription. If I didn’t have her — or someone else — I would have been stuck in pain.
Another example: by day three, I just wanted to take a shower. I felt disgusting. I had a big bandage on the front of my hip, and everyone said it was waterproof, but I didn’t trust it.
We used plastic wrap and waterproof tape to cover it so I could stand sideways in the shower and keep the area dry. I couldn’t have done that alone. Allison helped me set it up.
Taking that shower was such an uplifting experience. I’ve never taken a shower for granted since.
Another thing: for the first two weeks I slept in a recliner. It was easier to get in and out of. But when I transitioned back to a bed, it was really painful to get my leg up onto the mattress.
I had a strap, but having Allison there to help me lift my leg without putting pressure on the joint was incredibly helpful.
Those things were critical in my recovery, and Allison was a huge support through all of it. So thank you.
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Allison, would you say life is back to normal now? And can you remember roughly when it started to feel normal again?
Allison: Sure. I remember getting to a point where I thought, “I don’t even think about the surgeries anymore.” It was like you never had them.
It was probably when our second child was about a year to a year and a half old. We were just living normal life — husband, wife, two children, going about life.
And you were already planning or considering doing your first IRONMAN triathlon.
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Chris: And no, I didn’t get hit in the head and suddenly decide to do an IRONMAN.
I kind of wandered into it. One day I went to a golf course early and swam in the pool. Then I had time, so I got on a stationary bike. Then I walked the golf course — about seven miles.
It dawned on me I had basically done a simple triathlon: swim, bike, and walk.
Then I started researching — just out of curiosity — what this “IRONMAN” thing was all about. That’s how it started.
So if you’re saying things felt normal when our second child was around a year and a half, that would put me about four or five years past the first surgery and three or four years past the second.
Allison: Honestly, I’d say probably even sooner — maybe two to two and a half years after your second surgery.
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Chris: That makes sense. Once the kids came, we didn’t have time to think about hips. Life got busy.
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Anything you would have done differently looking back?
Allison: I would have forced you to do the surgery sooner.
You had a lot of hesitation. Surgery wasn’t just a last option — it was the last possible option in your mind.
You found a great surgeon with a more novel procedure that was better for someone who wanted an active lifestyle.
If we could have shortened the time you spent trying all the alternatives, you could have recovered sooner, felt better sooner, and returned to activity earlier.
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Chris: So what you’re saying, in a kind way, is you wanted me out of pain sooner and not to be such a baby about it.
Allison: Yeah.
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Any advice you’d give to spouses, friends, or family members supporting someone through hip replacement surgery?
Allison: A couple things.
First, take care of yourself. Get your own sleep and protect your own health, because you can’t support someone else if you’re running on empty.
Second, do your own research. You may not be the “researcher” in the relationship — Chris is definitely more of the researcher than I am — but do your own homework.
Learn what hip replacement surgery involves. Learn the recovery timeframes. Talk to people who’ve gone through it. Find out what helped them succeed.
And pay attention to whether those people are living the kind of lifestyle you or your spouse want to live after surgery. Those are the people you want to learn from.
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Chris: That’s great advice.
And I want to circle back to something you said earlier — that you would have encouraged me to have surgery sooner instead of making it the last possible option.
That’s a perfect segue into the next episode, because I’m going to talk about all the alternative treatments I tried. I was terrified of surgery and tried to avoid it or delay it for as long as possible.
So keep an eye out for that next episode.
Allison, thank you for coming on and sharing your perspective. And thank you to everyone for listening to The Hip Replacement Podcast.
Until next time, I wish you the best recovery possible.
Take care.
